


Falling Apart

by womanfromblackwater



Category: Red Dead Redemption (Video Games)
Genre: Angst, F/M, Period Typical Sexism, Pre-Game setting, Unplanned Pregnancy
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-04
Updated: 2020-08-04
Packaged: 2021-03-05 20:14:22
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,158
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25711198
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/womanfromblackwater/pseuds/womanfromblackwater
Summary: A look at how John and Abigail's relationship fell apart pre-game, and why it took John a full year after Jack was born to leave
Relationships: Abigail Roberts Marston/John Marston
Comments: 2
Kudos: 18





	Falling Apart

**Author's Note:**

> Saw a great thread on Tumblr about how John and Abigail are both to blame for how bad their relationship is at the beginning of the game, and this is what came of it. Both of their perspectives are pretty skewed, but that's how they ended up where they did.

“I have to tell you something.”

“Yeah?”

“Could you come here? Sit with me?”

Abigail watched as John thudded the axe into the stump and came over to the log that she had settled on. She took both his hands in hers and looked up into his eyes. 

“John, I thought this might be happenin’ for a while, but this morning I felt it and I was sure. I’m with child.”

She didn’t know what she expected his reaction to be, but the complete blankness of his expression was a surprise.

“Did you hear me? Darlin’, we’re gonna have a baby.” Trying to make her point clearer, she guided his hand to her belly. “There’s a little Marston in there.”

He furrowed his brow.

“You sure?”

Abigail beamed at him. 

“I felt it move this morning. Our little darling is comin’ along!”

John still looked strangely distant.

“Do I have to do anything?”

She laughed. 

“You already did your part, you silly man, now we just gotta wait.”

She leaned in to hug him, but he was already rising from the log. Watching him retreat, she decided that he just needed a little time to process the news. She had been nervous, too, when she first realized what was going on. But then he’d realize that they were going to be a real family and he would be just as excited as she was. She knew it. 

————————————————————————————————————————

John laughed as he took another beer from Bill. They’d had a series of good scores lately, and the mood in the camp was cheery. It didn’t hurt that John himself had been getting lots of extra attention. Abigail had become so swollen that even a fool could tell she was with child, and the rest of the gang never missed a chance to congratulate him or send extra food and money their way. Tonight she’d gone to bed early, complaining of aches in her back and feet, so John was free to drink with his friends, making increasingly bawdy jokes about her swollen breasts and increased libido, as well as his own virility. Even Dutch had slung an arm around his shoulders, making a speech about the future generations of their cause that John only half understood. Stumbling back into the tent and flopping on their shared cot, he gently patted Abigail’s belly. 

“Keep the good times comin’, baby Marston.”

————————————————————————————————————————

Abigail smiled down at the tiny bundle in her arms. Birthing him had been a nightmare, but now her son was sleeping soundly, his pink little face relaxed. John had been glad to hear it was a boy, and had taken him out of the tent to introduce to the rest of the camp, running him back in to his mother when the child started to cry. She could hear him outside, toasting the fact that her first pregnancy had resulted in a healthy son. 

He was less enthusiastic three hours later, when piercing screams pulled him from his sleep. Abigail rushed to get John junior (who they had started calling “Jack” less than an hour after his birth), climbing over John, who had pulled a pillow over his head to deaden the sound. By the time she’d quieted the baby and gotten him settled to feed, John had grabbed a bedroll and headed outside. 

“Everything’s alright, sweetheart. Your pa loves you. He just needs some rest, that’s all.” She stroked the baby’s cheek, then began to sing softly, partly to him and partly to herself. Nursing still felt strange, and it hadn’t helped that when she’d done it earlier in the day John had stared like it was the most alien thing he’d ever seen. Everything about her body seemed to make him uncomfortable now, and she hoped it wouldn’t be too long before she was able to get back to looking like the woman he’d fallen in love with. It would be easier then, she told herself. When they could make love again and Jack would sleep through the night and she could show John what a perfect family they were. 

————————————————————————————————————————

John looked down at the sleeping forms of Abigail and Jack. The boy was getting his teeth in, and it seemed that every moment he was awake he was fussing. He’d also taken to crawling after John everywhere he went. Abigail thought it was cute, but John found it intensely annoying. The only safe place for the baby to be was in their tent, but Abigail had begun to insist that he be taken everywhere.

It had been easier just a few months ago, when Jack couldn’t move on his own and Abigail had kept him by her side constantly. But as the boy arew, the nagging started. “John, look, he wants to play with you!” “John, take Jack into town, he likes to see new things!” “John, can you watch Jack while I go take a bath?” He’d started to hate the sound of his own name. She insisted that she wanted to be a family, but seemed to have missed the part of that where she was the mother and took care of the child. He was supposed to make sure they were fed and clothed and sheltered, and he’d been holding up his part of the deal. It wasn’t fair to just change the rules on him. 

And so, he figured, if she wasn’t keeping up her end of the bargain, he didn’t have to keep holding up his. The gang would take care of them, he knew they wouldn’t starve, so there was no need to stick around. He’d go be on his own, have his own adventures where there wasn’t a nagging wife or a crying baby clinging to him. Maybe they thought they needed him, but he certainly didn’t need them. 

————————————————————————————————————————

Abigail huddled in her lean-to, watching Jack pull chunks of vegetable out of the stew with his fingers and occasionally glaring in the direction of the campfire. The prodigal son had returned, and Dutch had been delighted to welcome him back into the fold without a word about what he had done. They may have forgotten, but she couldn’t. It seemed like the only other person who cared was Arthur, who had left the party and was reading on his cot. He’d been the one to bring her and Jack dinner so that she wouldn’t have to go look at smiling, laughing John.

Looking down at the toddler beside her only made her angrier. How could John look at their beautiful little boy and not feel anything? How could he say that he wasn’t even sure he was the father, after making such a big show of how she belonged to him? If he didn’t want her anymore, that was one thing. She could live with the heartbreak. But Jack? That was John’s son, and she was going to make damn sure that he didn’t grow up without his father.


End file.
